The challenges facing baalei tshuvah

One of the most significant trends in Jewish education over the last several decades has been the ba'al tshuvah movement, in which previously secular Jews embrace a life of religious observance.

The catalysts to such change are by now well known, from the outreach efforts of Chabad (a direct result of the imperative set out by the late Lubavitcher Rebbe) to the work of Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach, and to institutions popularly associated with this movement such as Aish HaTorah and Ohr Somayach.

The different manifestations of the phenomenon range from the post-Six Day War return to religion to the fallout from the liberal 1960s, when individuals attracted to spiritual ideas and ideals converted this energy to a Torah way of life.

There is a unique importance in the decision of certain Jews, in an era of rampant intermarriage and assimilation, to rediscover their heritage and commit to the path of mitzvot. Baalei tshuvah thus buck the overwhelming inclination of much of present-day Jewry to shun a religious worldview. But such a radical shift in life path, even if it leads to an uplifting transformation and structured daily regimen, does not necessarily eliminate a host of difficulties that require serious examination.

The challenges to baalei tshuvah upon becoming observant may include everything from their relationship with the "frum from birth" community to interactions with their own parents and extended families. Indeed, for the baal tshuvah, a family celebration is not necessarily an innocent matter, as it conjures up potential kashrut and Shabbat violations as part of the mix.

A host of other questions also arise: Do baalei tshuvah tend to remain overly or exclusively attached to the institutions that may have nurtured their initial interest in Judaism and subsequent growth? Does this attachment hinder their religious growth in any way? From a psychological perspective, how do baalei tshuvah contend with the different parts of their experience (their life before versus their life after, so to speak).

But perhaps the most challenging issue, from an educational point of view, pertains to the children of baalei tshuvah. Recently, Rabbi Yaacov Haber, the former national director of Jewish education for the Orthodox Union, wrote that the challenge of being a member of the second generation can lead to grave problems. Some even end up rejecting the very lifestyle their parents struggled so hard to attain, often with a disdainful retort such as, "You rejected your upbringing, now it's my turn." Often the baal tshuvah remains quite alone to handle these dilemmas, caught between their Orthodox co-religionists and their secular relatives who, respectively, either can't relate to the problem or may not see it as a problem at all.

On Saturday, Nov. 5, at 8 p.m., at Shaarei Shomayim Synagogue in Toronto, I will be joined by three fellow baalei tshuvah – Dr. Lisa Aiken, Prof. Eric Lawee and Rabbi Michael Skobac – as we probe the above-mentioned issues and others. This will open Torah in Motion's fourth annual "Renewing Our Spirit" conference, and for all those interested in the religious quest in the modern world, we hope you can join us.